You know, it's funny how you think someone is your best friend, your confident, and then it all blows up in your face.
It makes you think, "what happened in the events leading up to this?" "What went wrong?" and to be frank, I honestly don't know. If friends are true friends then they work through things, not get upset and declare the friendship "rightfully over" before even speaking to the other person about what is going on. That's NOT a friendship. Not at all.
To say I'm not hurt would be a lie. To say I don't care and that it doesn't break my heart would also be a lie. To say that I'm flat out numb and pissed couldn't be any more truthful than it comes.
A lot of things have happened. A lot of crap I have put myself through just to ensure YOUR happiness. Then when I'm obviously having some difficulties you leave me out in the cold? If after a 2 and a half year friendship you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best.
Too many times I've been betrayed by you. Too many disappointments and letdowns, but I sucked it up and moved on, yet I'm the selfish one?
You constantly begged me to skip class. I failed my final by default in December because you wanted me to come help with your wedding. I walked over a mile from Nate's apartment because you changed the plans last minute and I had no other way to work. We drove all the way to your sisters house for the super bowl just to have to turn around and go home because no one bothered to give us directions. I spent your entire wedding serving food, washing dishes and cleaning. I've talked you out of numerous attempts of ending your relationship with your husband. Or hurting yourself. I've attempted to convince you that everything would be okay EVERY. SINGLE. TIME. WE. TALKED. I missed my church because you wanted us to go to yours, but then when I invite you to mine you say you can't because the you're "disloyal" to your church. I let you sleep in my boyfriends bed because you were lonely. I've done things numerous times after work, with you know how exhausted I was, because you claimed that I hated you and I wanted to show you at that point in time you were my best friend. This list never seems to cease because I can think of at least fifteen more instances to name.
On another note, a thing that just blows my mind... We've discussed numerous times how a certain "friend" of yours really isn't a friend at all, and now that they're back in the picture you deem ME as the terrible friend? Yeah, okay.
Have you looked in the mirror. We ALL have faults, I'm not perfect, I never claimed to be perfect, but don't you DARE try and say you don't have any. I've sacrificed so much for a friendship that wasn't even a friendship according to you.
There are three types of friends.
Season, Reason and Lifetime.
Some friends are in your life for a season, they leave you just as quickly as they come in. Some friends are there for a reason, and when they leave you learn something from them, good or bad. This helps us to grow. And then there are those friends that are rare and hard to find. The ones that are there through the good and the bad, through thick and thin. When you find these friends you must hold onto them, cherish them and appreciate them, for God has blessed you with a very special gift.
/RANT OVER.
